● For the devoted, the obsessed, the owned
Practical dachshund advice. Real-life stories of rescue dogs, reactivity, separation anxiety and loving these ridiculous, beautiful animals.
Join A Letter from Snooty McSausage — real talk for real sausage dog owners. Free, fortnightly.
Smart reads for people owned by dachshunds
The sausages
Meet the management
McKenzie
The OG Snooty McSausage
Standard smooth-haired red. Nine years old. Currently on a mission to reach her target weight of 9.5kg and furious about it. A jealous, needy, codependent bully. Cat terrorist and chaser of skateboards. Would leave me for a piece of fried chicken. The love of my life.
Elodie
AKA Baby Flouff / Psycho Muppet
Miniature long-haired shaded cream. My problem child. Arrived an emaciated hot mess. Former backyard breeder surrender. Reactive to everything, devoted to me, and capable of a howl that makes strong men flinch. Has variously been compared to a ferret, a Nudibranch, and Falkor the luckdragon from The Neverending Story.
★ As featured in The Guardian
“A sausage dog adoption nudged me back to hope”
The Guardian · October 2025
The story
Two rescue sausages. One obsessed human.
I didn’t plan on getting a dachshund. I applied for forty rescue dogs during lockdown and got ghosted by every single one — including an elderly chap with a heart condition. Then McKenzie appeared, and my heart rapidly reassembled in the shape of a sausage dog.
Two dachshunds and several years later, I’ve navigated separation anxiety training, IVDD prevention, a vet-supervised weight loss journey, and the emotional rollercoaster of adopting a reactive miniature who arrived skin and bones. As a professional writer, I created this site to share what I’ve learned — the useful stuff, without the panic.
What you’ll find here
Everything your sausage dog would Google if they had thumbs
Real-world dachshund health advice, honest product reviews, and writing that actually makes sense when you’re freaking out at 2am.
Health without the panic
IVDD prevention and back care, weight management, separation anxiety, reactivity — when to worry and when to put down Dr Google. Written by someone whose dachshund is literally on a vet-supervised diet right now.
Product picks that aren’t ads
Harnesses, ramps, beds, food, calming aids — tested on real dachshunds with real opinions. If something’s rubbish, we’ll say so. Snooty has standards.
Stories from the trenches
Rescue spotlights, reader sausage dog tales, training wins (and fails), and the occasional dispatch from McKenzie and Elodie — who are very busy doing nothing.
Latest from the blog
Recent reads
Health
The honest guide to IVDD: what every dachshund owner actually needs to know
Forget the scare stories. Here’s a clear-eyed look at intervertebral disc disease — risk factors, early signs, and what the research says about prevention.
8 min read · Back care
Reviews
We tested 7 “dachshund-friendly” harnesses so you don’t have to
Not all harnesses are built for the long and low. Here’s what actually fits, what chafes, and what your sausage will tolerate.
5 min read · Gear
Stories
How McKenzie and Elodie changed my life: our PetRescue story
On adopting two rescue sausage dogs, building unexpected community ties, and falling ridiculously, head-over-heels in love.
5 min read · As featured on PetRescue
A Letter from Snooty McSausage
Tips, tricks, stories and info from the heart of a hotdog. Subscribe and I’ll send you my free eBook — the Dachshund Back Care Bible — because Snooty insists.
No spam. Unsubscribe anytime. McKenzie judges silently, not digitally.
Made in the Blue Mountains with two rescue sausage dogs underfoot.
Love, Snooty McSausage’s Human
Snooty McSausages 